I’ve heard clients say, “I’ve tried counselling, CBT, diet, exercise. I felt better for a while, and now I feel like I’m back where I was.”
Why does this keep happening?
The mind likes what is familiar. That doesn’t always mean it is good for us. If the underlying habit is unhelpful, the mind can keep returning to it because it knows it so well. That’s how toxic cycles can develop. The subconscious is more powerful than the conscious mind. That’s why willpower alone usually isn’t enough.
Change takes time
Changing any habit takes small, consistent actions that the subconscious can accept and, over time, normalise. The body and mind both need time to adapt.
Think of trying on a wedding dress. Very few people have one fitting and then get married. It usually takes several visits, with adjustments each time, until it fits properly.
Change in the mind can work in a similar way.
The subconscious mind is always taking in information. That information is then filtered, distorted, and shaped by our values and beliefs before it is stored. The first time we try to change, the barrier can feel high. It takes effort to build new connections, and the old pathways are still strong.
Why old patterns return
With time, practice, and perseverance, the new pathways grow stronger. The old ones weaken, but they do not disappear overnight.
Whether it’s feeling low, over eating, being busy to the point of exhaustion…
We are all human. We slip up. We make mistakes.
By noticing you’re feeling like this again, you’ve taken an encouraging step forwards. You’re aware of it.
What matters is how we use the experience. If it helps us recognise the path we’re on and move towards what matters most, then the setback may have been worth it. It can give us greater awareness and insight. The feeling itself carries a message, though it may not be the one we first expect.
What to do next
Pause. Breathe. Take one small step in a positive direction. Then repeat. Notice what happens and adjust as you go.
If you need support on your journey, please get in touch at david@meonlybetter.co.uk.
I offer free initial consultations, so you can find out whether hypnotherapy is the right support for you.
Image courtesy by Terry Granger on Unsplash
Looking for more? Why not read what-do-you-see-stress-mindset
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